It's been one of those weeks so far.
And Wednesday is only half-way over.
The change in weather has me stuffy and
I'm being forced to wear mittens in an effort
not to claw my eyes out from major dryness.
So I didn't really come here to whine.
Despite my sniffles and red eyes,
I am elated at what just hit the shelf.
An excerpt:
"...in the romantic-comedy world there are many
specimens of women who—like Vulcans or Mothra—do
not exist in real life. Here are some examples:
The Klutz
When a beautiful actress is cast in a movie, executives
rack their brains to find some kind of flaw in the character
she plays that will still allow her to be palatable. She can’t
be overweight or not perfect-looking, because who
would pay to see that? A female who is not one hundred
per cent perfect-looking in every way? You might as well
film a dead squid decaying on a beach
somewhere for two hours.
So they make her a Klutz.
The hundred-per-cent-perfect-looking female is
perfect in every way except that she constantly bonks
her head on things. She trips and falls and spills
soup on her affable date (Josh Lucas. Is that his name?
I know it’s two first names. Josh George? Brad Mike?
Fred Tom? Yes, it’s Fred Tom). The Klutz clangs into
stop signs while riding her bike and knocks over
giant displays of fine china in department stores.
Despite being five feet nine and weighing a hundred
and ten pounds, she is basically like a drunk buffalo
who has never been a part of human society.
But Fred Tom loves her anyway.
The Woman Who Works in an Art Gallery
How many freakin’ art galleries are out there? Are people
buying visual art on a daily basis? This posh/smart/classy
profession is a favorite in movies. It’s in the same
realm as kindergarten teacher or children’s-book
illustrator in terms of accessibility: guys don’t
really get it, but it is likable and nonthreatening.
Art Gallery Woman: “Dust off the Warhol.
You know, that Campbell’s Soup one in the crazy color!
We have an important buyer coming into town,
and this is a really big deal for my career.I have no time for this!”
The Gallery Worker character is the rare
female movie archetype that has a male counterpart.
Whenever you meet a handsome, charming, successful
man in a romantic comedy, the heroine’s friend
always says the same thing: “He’s really successful.
He’s”—say it with me—“an architect!”
There are, like, nine people in the entire world
who are architects, and one of them is my dad.
None of them look like Patrick Dempsey."
-- A